Mostly quotations. Curated by Semi since back when my VCR (yes) was blinking twelve.
Monday, November 27, 2023
Victor Hugo, Les Miserables
Monday, November 13, 2023
Margalo's pitches for senior quote
I want to thank my chiropractor for always having my back.
I want to thank my nail tech for always holding my hand.
I want to thank my massage therapist for always making me feel kneaded.
Sunday, November 12, 2023
Tenor saxophonist Al Cohn [via Brian Chellas]
Attributed to Henry Thoreau in Elmore Leonard, Cat Chaser [via Brian Chellas]
Beware of all enterprises that require new clothes.
Lady Astor and Winston Churchill
LADY ASTOR: If I were married to you, I'd put poison in your coffee.
WINSTON CHURCHILL: If you were my wife, I'd drink it.
From Wilder, You All Spoken Here [via Brian Chellas]
If brains were dynamite he wouldn't have enough to blow his nose.
If a bird had his brains he'd fly backwards.
He's so ugly no fly'd ever land on him.
Looks like he's been chewin' tobacco and spittin' in the wind.
When he was a baby he was so ugly they fed him with a slingshot.
She's so fat that if she had to haul ass she'd have to make two trips.
[As tearful as] a child that's lost his chewing gum on a henhouse floor.
Nathaniel Hawthorne, House of Seven Gables [via Brian Chellas]
Ecclesiastes, 12:12 [via Brian Chellas]
. . . be admonished: of making many books there is no end; and much study is a weariness of the flesh.
Burma Shave ad [via Brian Chellas]
She kissed the hairbrush / by mistake. / She thought it was / her husband Jake.
de Palfrey, in John le Carre, The Russia House [via Brian Chellas]
Just the usual triumph of the fattest, disguised as a rational deduction.
Sherlock Holmes, in Arthur Conan Doyle, “The Copper Beeches” [via Brian Chellas]
Crime is common. Logic is rare.
Saint Augustine, Confessions, book 4, chapter 6 [via Brian Chellas]
I was at the same time thoroughly tired of living and extremely frightened of dying.